


Finding the Balance

by Soulsborne123



Category: Ghost Hunt
Genre: F/F, F/M, Multi, OT3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:40:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24800188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soulsborne123/pseuds/Soulsborne123
Summary: They thought they'd given up on him. She never dreamed they'd give her a chance. They never quite expected it would turn out like this.
Relationships: Hara Masako/Oliver Davis, Hara Masako/Taniyama Mai, Oliver Davis/Taniyama Mai, Shibuya Kazuya/Taniyama Mai
Comments: 16
Kudos: 32





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm digging this story again so I think I'll finish this up. This is slightly re-worked and cross-posted from FFnet.

#  Chapter 1

It didn't seem too long ago when they'd both confessed they'd given up.

It seemed clear that he would never see them as more than co-workers, or maybe, if they were being really optimistic, even friends. They both agreed that he was, and probably always will be, married to his work.

But a couple of years after he'd had time to settle down— no longer as the fake Shibuya Kazuya, CEO of Shibuya Psychic Research who had come to Japan solely to search in secret for his twin brother’s dead body, but as  _ Oliver Davis _ —, slowly they both began to realize that he was actually quite approachable. If he'd allow it.

And once again their hope returned.

Or maybe it never really left Masako's heart at all.

However, she had to have known that eventually things would turn out this way. Mai and Naru may not have put into words their feelings for each other as of yet (she hadn't heard anything from Mai at least), but they might as well have.

It was  _ that  _ obvious.

It hurt at first. But as her relationship with Mai evolved into a  _ genuine _ relationship, with its ups and downs, push and pull mechanic that always found its way back into harmony that brought with it a deeper understanding of each other, she eventually came to accept the truth. She let go of her long unrequited feelings for Naru and felt completely, and perfectly, and incandescently, happy for her best friend.

One time Mai asked her if she and Naru still went out on 'dates'. Masako had laughed and tried her best to assure her friend that it was entirely platonic and mostly business, but that she'd refrain from going out with him anymore in the future if it made her uncomfortable. Mai had grabbed her hand and told her to do no such thing, that it wasn't her place to demand anything, and that she should do anything she wanted because otherwise, what kind of rivalry would it be?

She couldn't understand then why Mai still egged her on. Maybe Mai enjoyed their playful competition, but she'd had enough. She was finally content to watch them, not with envy, but with simple longing, hoping that maybe someday she'll find someone too.

But as time went on, she realized that she'd been bullshitting herself all along. (And maybe that was why Mai always egged her on, because Mai knew her better than she ever knew herself. Taniyama Mai and her ridiculous, spot-on intuition.)

What she'd done was put herself second to her best friend, learned to become a martyr by sacrificing her own happiness (unachievable as it seemed), because she loved Mai too dearly.

But the truth was: she wasn't longing to find  _ someone _ . It was always  _ him _ . And she didn't just watch the two of them with 'simple longing', she watched them with  _ envy _ .

But accepting that fact meant that sometimes she hated Mai and that ate away at her chest, so she kept it locked away and fooled herself into believing her lie. And it became a lie that wasn't-a-lie, not entirely. However it didn't stop that stabbing pain on her chest from occurring whenever she found the two of them together, which in turn, caused more stabbing pain as the guilt built up. Once, she asked Ayako if she could be having a heart attack, but unfortunately the Miko didn't think the joke funny. Or maybe she didn't even realize it  _ was  _ a joke, given that she'd said it with a straight face.

Getting back to the point—why did it have to be so complicated?

Masako struggled with these feelings alone for years, especially that morning when she was suddenly struck by the fact that wow, she was already twenty-four years old and her love-life was getting absolutely nowhere.

Which is why she almost got knocked out of her chair when Mai suddenly admitted to her with no preamble, "Masako… I don't like feeling like this. And I'm really sorry but… I just need to tell you now because I think you should know. But sometimes there are days where I get so… jealous of you, that I feel that I almost hate you."

They were sitting at a cafe, on a weekend morning, for their usual brunch date.

She just finished swallowing a slice of her pancake when Mai dropped the bombshell. Reaching slowly for her tea, she struggled to keep herself steady and asked, "What in the world for?"

Mai sighed and rubbed the back of her neck. "You and Naru… He seems… and tell me the truth, ok? Are you guys dating?"

This time, Masako choked. Mai instantly rushed to her side and patted her back, handing her a glass of water. "Hey, easy!"

She spent a few minutes coughing (a waiter had come out to give them more water and asked if they needed help, much to her embarrassment), and after fighting back the urge of her body to cough  _ just one last time _ , she looked at Mai and as gracefully as she could muster, emphatically cried, " _ I beg your pardon _ ?"

Mai quickly shot her hand up in a supplicating manner. "Oh, crap. Please, Masako, I-I'm sorry! I shouldn't have—It's not my place—"

"Are you suspecting he is cheating on you, and that  _ I _ ,  _ of all people _ , would entertain such a thing behind your back?"

Truthfully, that hurt.

"Wha?" Mai frowned in confusion. "What cheating? What do you mean? Why would he be cheating on me, we're not even—" eyes widening, Mai suddenly grabbed her hand and squeezed so hard Masako almost cried out. "—Wait, no! Masako, I'm not like,  _ jealous  _ in the way that I am  _ accusing _ you! I would  _ never _ think you'd do that kind of thing! I'm only jealous in the way that I envy your position! Naru and I are not—no, no! Oh, and I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that. Did I hurt you?"

Masako could have face-palmed.

Oh.

Her shoulders relaxed and she rubbed her hand. She was thankful to hear that Mai would never think of her being despicable that way, and the way she reacted was genuinely touching and endearing. But furthermore, she was glad to know that Mai and Naru were actually not together.

Yet.

And she felt that stabbing pain again.

While she was silently introspecting, she realized Mai was nearly driving herself close to hysteria as she tried to explain herself, but instead of quickly consoling her, Masako kept her face neutral and allowed it to happen. She decided long ago that she liked seeing Mai's flushed, pouty face.

"B-because, you know, most of the time he prefers your company over any of ours, and you guys just always seem so comfortable and content around each other. And also the way he looks at you, it's so gentle and I feel…" Mai gripped her chest tightly. "You know he never does it when he thinks others could see him."

Masako scoffed. "Mai, you must either be really stupid, or you're doing a roundabout way of gloating."

"What! I'm not gloating! And I'm not stupid. He really does, you know." Mai sunk back in her seat and with a bittersweet smile, murmured. "I think he's finally ready to move on from what happened with Gene. Which is great. It's time that he did and I'm truly happy for him. Ah, for you both, I should say."

"But weren't you just complaining about being jealous of me?"

"I wasn't  _ complaining _ ! I was  _ confessing _ ! That insinuates guilt, you know! So I don't  _ want _ to feel this way, but I do, and I'm telling you so I learn to get over it because I want to be happy for you. Like, truly happy for you. Because I really like you."

Masako began to laugh. Loudly and uncontrollably. She would have been embarrassed of her actions any other time, but right now, she only felt light and free.

"Are you okay? What? What's so funny?"

"You." She wiped the tears from her eyes and calmed herself. "That's  _ so  _ like you, Mai. Did you know I was feeling the exact same way toward you and him and had been internalizing it all these years? But unlike you, I was a coward and decided to turn away from it because I didn't want to think for a second of envying you enough to hate you. I also really like you and didn't want this to come in between us again."

"Years! That's insane, Masako. Tell me these things!"

"Yes, I should have. I'm sorry."

Mai smiled. "So you felt the same?" then she grinned. "Peas in a pod, you and me, huh?"

"I suppose so."

"So I guess that's out of the way and there's no hard feelings anymore, right?"

"None on my part. Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry again that I kept it bottled inside. If you hadn't said anything…"

Mai grabbed her hand again and squeezed, gently this time. "It's alright, no worries. What's important is we're on the same page again. But...Me and Naru? How so?"

"It is clear to me that Naru has feelings for you."

"That's impossible. I already confessed to him a long time ago, remember? And I was gently brushed aside and we agreed I was confused and that I liked Gene."

"I don't follow. That was a while ago, so I don't see why things couldn't be different now. And besides, later on you realized your feelings for Naru were also real, did you not?"

"Yes… but Naru doesn't know that. So all this time, I mean, let's consider for a second that he's actually a  _ normal _ person— then wouldn't he think that's too weird? Getting confessed to by someone who was formerly in-love with your dead twin brother. I mean, you know, supposing he'd think like a normal person and all."

"Well, supposing he is actually a normal person, then he can't help who he falls in love with." Masako sighed. "You should see the way he looks at you. He isn't very emotionally eloquent, but around you… he just seems so content and happy. You should really be more mindful of these things."

"Hey, look who's talking. That's how he is around  _ you _ ."

"Impossible. He has his eyes on  _ you _ ."

"Why don't we go to the data room and see if we have any actual footage because I swear to you, he looks at  _ you _ that way. Okay, wow. Are we the weirdest rivals ever, or what?"

They leaned into each other and giggled into their hands, which were still linked together in solidarity. And they stayed there, enjoying each others' company for a while longer.


	2. Chapter 2

#  Chapter 2

"I think I'm done."

That sentence, out of nowhere, was followed by an obnoxiously loud slurp as Mai finished up her drink, mostly imbibing air. Masako slowly put her book down and raised her eyes to find Mai staring at her with a defeated, but serene smile.

"Yes, you're just drinking iced-flavored air now."

Mai burst out laughing. "That was a good one! Ha-ha-ha! But no, you dummy! I meant Naru."

Masako rolled her eyes, annoyed that Mai would choose to go back to believing it would be so easy to do so, just like that. They'd been telling themselves that for years and yet two years later, after sitting in that same cafe lamenting about how much their love for him made them so jealous to the point that they ended up sometimes hating each other, they were still pining for him.

At least  _ she  _ was still willing to admit it.

"Right," was all that she could say, tone dripping with much sarcasm.

"I know what you're thinking. You think that I think I'm over him. Well, you're wrong because I know I'm not."

Masako sighed, placing a hand under her chin and leaning forward on the table. "So what then?"

"I'm done. I just don't think I can stand to keep loving him any longer than I already have and still get nowhere. I haven't moved on, but I  _ want _ to move on. Even if it means lying to myself about it."

In her mind she wanted to scream that she was actually  _ so very close _ . She was practically at the finish line. She just needed to hang in there for a little bit longer. But looking at Mai's determined face made her stop in her tracks.

How long had Mai been trying to push past his walls? It was unfair to ask more from her.

If Mai was done holding on to that hope, then she was done. If she believed she could find happiness elsewhere, then she had all the right to seek it elsewhere, preferably from someone who would allow themselves to be loved and love her in return. Mai deserved that.

Naru shouldn’t have kept pushing her at a distance. He was so stupid.

"Fine. But know that I'll take this as an opportunity."

"Sure, but I don't think you need to rely on 'opportunities'," she replied with a shrug. Masako raised her brow at this and in response, Mai just smiled wryly. "Still don't believe me, huh? You really can't see that he has a soft spot for you?"

"I don't want to hear that coming from a blind idiot like you."

"You're even starting to sound like him! You hang out too much."

"Mai!"

"Even the intonation…"

Masako scoffed in annoyance and crossed her arms. After a few moments of silence (she had been ignoring Mai's silent snickering), she asked, "So. What made you decide this all of a sudden?"

"Ah. Actually I've been going to mixers with friends lately. One guy asked me out a couple of weeks ago. I never followed through, but he asked me out again yesterday. I thought he would have forgotten about me by now."

"Hm. And what sort of person is he?"

"He's really nice and outgoing. Just a little older than me. I think he's kind of cool."

Masako massaged her temples. "And you're serious about seeing this guy?"

"I at least want to try. We're going out for dinner tonight."

"Where?"

"We agreed nothing too fancy. Just at a  _ yakiniku _ bar nearby. We'll keep it casual."

"Alright. Just be careful, and don't get too much alcohol. You know you start acting stupid when you're drunk."

Mai rolled her eyes. "I know, I know. You guys just won't drop it, will you? Even Naru still brings that up during the holiday parties. Sheesh."

-0-

"She's done."

Masako watched as Naru paused in his movement, brows furrowed in confusion.

"Who is?"

She sighed loudly and placed her fork down. "Mai."

"...Shall I name every activity she's prone to doing until I find the correct answer to your mysterious puzzle?"

Masako rolled her eyes. "With you. She's done with you. How do you feel about that now, still feeling cheeky?"

At this, Naru didn't respond. He simply went back to his pasta and only after a few minutes of silence did he ask nonchalantly, "What am I supposed to feel?"

"Probably like a failure."

A gentle smile played at the corner of his lips. "Is that how you feel?"

Masako raised her brow. "What is that supposed to mean?"

But Naru merely shrugged. "Is there something we should do about it?"

"Well, I suppose I am interested to see what this man is like. She claims he is nice. Maybe have her bring him into the office next time so we could all meet him. I'm sure Takigawa-san and the others would be curious as well."

"It's not my place to ask to meet her boyfriend."

"He is not her boyfriend. They're still just dating to see if they could work out. And I suppose it  _ would _ be strange for you to ask. Very well, I'll speak to her later, myself."

Naru gently patted his lips with a napkin and carelessly flipped through the menu again. "Shall we try their  _ struffoli _ this time?"

"Oh yes, I have been curious about it. Though, that might be too sweet for you…"

"That's fine. If I don't like it, you can always just give it to Mai for tomorrow."

Masako hummed. "Okay, I think she might enjoy this one."

-0-

Yasuhara was the last one to exit out the door. Before fully leaving, the group turned back around and with a wave, bid her another goodbye, with Mai's voice rising above the others.

"See you again later!"

Masako smiled and dipped her head in response.

Once the door clicked close, the office, which had been so full of life just minutes ago, descended into absolute silence. Masako glanced toward Naru's office and sighed. 

She headed toward the kitchenette and began preparing a pot of tea, her practiced hands automatically knowing exactly how much to use and how long to steep, even as she did it absentmindedly.

When her preparation was finished, she knocked before opening his door.

"Would you like some tea?"

Naru nodded, not even bothering to look up from his computer.

She entered the room and gently closed the door behind her. As she placed his cup on his table, she peered over his shoulder and asked, "Is it that important?" She did not wait for an invitation as she sat down on the empty seat across from him.

"The deadline is in three days."

"But you didn't even get to meet him. What was the point of inviting him over?"

"I was not the one who invited him, Mai did. Because  _ you _ suggested for the group to meet him." He typed a couple more sentences in before pushing his seat back a little, sighing and pressing lightly on his eyes. "Besides, that offer was extended nearly two months ago. Things come up. I will not work around  _ his _ schedule."

"Fair enough."

Naru reached for his cup and took a sip, glancing at her with an incline of his head and asked, "And? What did you think? I do hope he eventually made a favorable impression for himself."

"'Eventually'? You barely even met him. What impression could you have gotten from the five second introduction you graced him with?"

"Aside from the impertinence he's shown in coming to the office with barely even a notice, seeing him in person today for even just five seconds is more than enough time for me to form a negative conclusion." He took another sip.

"Really? Without sufficient data?"

"It's easy to extrapolate. He is obnoxious, over-confident, loud, and much too talkative. In other words, completely irritating."

"How did you conclude that?"

"For one: his pants were far too bold."

Masako hid a grin behind her kimono sleeve. "I had no idea you hated yellow."

"Not particularly, but you can’t deny that in choosing a particularly bright color out of the norm, he gets to stick out as much as possible. Possibly done so he can unapologetically showcase his uniqueness."

Masako laughed. "A fine psychologist!"

"Aside from looking ridiculous, he also comes across as extremely pig headed. From what I could hear through these irritatingly thin doors, he loves to dominate all conversation. It was hard to drown out his voice, hence why I have fallen behind on my paper."

"Wow. You hate him that much?"

He shrugged carelessly.

"Could you be feeling jealous?"

At this he gave no reply, but he held her gaze with an intense and inscrutable expression. She wondered if she'd ever find out what was going on in his mind.

"Well… aside from his questionable fashion sense, I think he seemed like a nice man. He was very charming and knew how to carry on a conversation with everybody… about anything. And he was very enthusiastic… about everything."

"So you see, I was entirely correct."

Masako ignored him. "He's an up-and-coming music producer. Apparently he and Takigawa-san have shared acquaintances. Everyone appeared to like him very much, and he seemed very attentive to Mai as well..."

The words seem to hang in the air, with nowhere else to go. Naru was apparently sticking to his conclusion, and she had nothing else to report on the matter. 

Satoshi-san was a lost cause.

"Why are you grimacing?" Naru asked, and with a smug raise of his brow teased, "Not so charming after all, was he then?"

"... No, actually, he really was. I think he would suit her very well. It's just that…"

When Naru made no sign of leading her on, she huffed and spat, "I don't know why, but I just didn't like him."

"I see. What will you tell Mai?"

"Should I say anything? I suppose I really should. It wouldn't be good to lie to her." Masako bit her lip. 

He scooted his seat back toward the table again, made a couple of clicks, and then shut the monitor off. He stood up and grabbed both their empty cups from the table and made his way to the door. Before crossing the threshold, he turned around and asked, "Do you have something else scheduled for the rest of tonight?"

"No." Masako stood up and followed him out toward the kitchenette.

He turned on the faucet and began washing the cups. "Then would you like to accompany me for dinner?"

"I thought you had that paper to write?"

He smiled wryly. "Break."

Back when they were younger, Masako wouldn't have believed Naru even knew that word existed. And now here he was, extending out dinner invitations.

Masako smiled. "Okay."


	3. Chapter 3

#  Chapter 3

When she returned from her final walk around the premises, she found the door to their base ajar. Peeking inside, she saw Mai absentmindedly staring at Naru's back as he flipped through his notebook. As if suddenly struck by a thought, Mai stood up and made her way toward him and Masako took this opportunity to slip inside, undetected.

She watched her best friend say a few quiet words to Naru, causing him to raise his brow in amusement before replying just as quietly so she could only wonder what their conversation was about.

Mai rolled her eyes, pouted, and her high pitched intonation carried her words across the room as she whined, "Naruuuu! Come ooon!"

Naru sighed pointedly, but still he shifted lower to allow her to read his notebook over his shoulders and began explaining something to her. She would have scoffed, but Masako perfectly understood why Naru enjoyed pretending Mai was a bother. Besides, after all their years together, the group was finally able to tell the difference between Naru's legitimate anger from his playful teasing, so Mai wasn't taking him too seriously. 

It was mildly infuriating to her how close they were to each other and they didn't even seem to realize it.

Masako heard footsteps in the hallway and the door opened inward, blocking the newcomers from view.

Someone scoffed quietly and Ayako's voice hissed, " _ Flirting again _ ."

John stifled his chuckles, paused, then whispered back, " _ Ah, but isn't Mai-san involved with Satoshi-san, though?" _

" _ Who cares? She should dump him immediately." _

" _ Matsuzaki-san _ ..."

It seemed like John wanted to say something in response to that crude conclusion but instead he lamented, " _ It is unfortunate, I must say." _

" _ It's always been obvious there's something between  _ those _ two. Who knew she was a natural two-timer though, huh?" _

" _ Sure you weren’t the one who taught her that?" _

" _ Shut up, Monk." _

When they closed the door, they realized she was within earshot of their scandalous conversation. Ayako, Takigawa, and John all bit their lips and collectively mumbled, " _ Oh. Sorry _ ."

Masako could only smile back in reply, amused at their consideration, but she always knew they rooted for those two.

"I felt no more lingering spirits while I was doing my rounds, so I'm certain our purification was successful. Were any of you able to find anything else?" she asked out loud for everyone's sake.

Naru glanced back, shut his notes, and made his way toward them with Mai trailing closely behind him.

"None. I think this case is done. Great job for once, Ayako."

"You could say it without the jab, but thank you."

"Kiyoko-san feels distraught for not remembering much during her possession these past few weeks, but she will be fine. Her daughter called and said she will be staying with her for two weeks in order to keep an eye on her. She'll arrive later today, so I will stay behind and wait for her arrival."

Naru nodded curtly. "Then if that's all, let's finish packing all the equipment. Lin already went out to fetch the van."

-0-

"What are you all doing here? The office is not open for business today."

The group made a collective sigh and shared a knowing smile. Nearly ten years later and Naru still asked that same question, on that same day, knowing full well what their answer would be and that nothing he said would have deterred them from coming.

"I've told you all before that there is no need for your attendance, especially as it fell on a weekday."

Though he had branched out to include dark shades of blue and purple to his fashion repertoire, today, he wore his trademark black attire. The rest of them, likewise, wore all black.

"I always have this day blocked out of my work schedule," Ayako said with a wave of her hand.

"I didn't book any gigs today either, so I'm not particularly busy."

"Of course I'll also be coming with," Yasuhara added. "Gene-san helped us a lot over the years. Besides, this is SPR tradition."

“Agreed,” John chimed in.

Mai huffed and crossed her arms, "You obviously can't tell  _ me  _ not to come. I want to see him."

"There's no point in refusing our company. We'll all go regardless," Masako finally joined in.

Beside Naru, Lin adjusted his sleeves while attempting to hide his amusement.

At being outnumbered (as he always was on this day) Naru finally broke a small smile. He nodded. "I see. Thank you all for coming."

-0-

After they paid their respects, Takigawa and Yasuhara left to take a stroll around the familiar camping area nearby. Lin found himself a nice spot under a tree and began working on his laptop. She and John decided they were going to visit the old forgotten school. Meanwhile, Mai and Naru wordlessly agreed to head toward the woods together.

In this personally sacred place, everyone just naturally gave the two of them some space.

Looking back at their retreating figure, Masako couldn't help but laugh to herself and wonder when either of them would finally gather enough courage to just reach out for the other's hand. They literally only had to move an inch.

She shook her head in half exasperation, half amusement.

"Is there something the matter, Masako-san?"

"Ah, no, nothing. Just musing to myself.”


	4. Chapter 4

#  Chapter 4

People tended to believe him incapable of processing other people’s feelings, that he was a robot who understood only logic and facts, not emotions. 

They were wrong. 

Of course he knew when someone was angry, or happy, or sad. In fact, it is thanks to his keen eyes and knack for careful observation that he could immediately tell when someone was having a bad day. That was simple and he wasn’t stupid. Where his problem lay was in reading social cues and understanding his position in relation to the person— whether they’d appreciate it if he inquired what was wrong or would they just think he was being nosy? 

And, of course, it begged the more important question—why should he even care to get involved?

Thus he never bothered with such pleasantries. But there is a stark difference between not being perceptive and not really caring. One implied he was inept, the other… well.

He was contemplating thus when he really should have been concentrating on revising JSPR’s financial report, especially since some of the maths weren’t adding up. With Lin soon leaving, he needed to be even more extra vigilant about keeping his own records and making sure everything lined up. 

If only he could have some tea. 

He’d been waiting for his usual cup. Mai had arrived at the office nearly three hours ago and not once after her initial good afternoon had he heard any other peep from her. It seemed his afternoon tea was forgotten.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and stole a glance outside. 

Still the same.

Naru sighed and finally stood up. 

She didn’t even seem to notice him as he walked right by her desk and into the kitchenette. Even after all the tinkering of china and whistling of the kettle she remained motionless, staring absentmindedly at the report she was supposed to be double checking in her hand. 

“Here,” he said, placing a freshly prepared cup of hot tea on her table. He saw her blink at him several times, looking as if it took monumental effort on her part to yank herself out of the vegetable state she was in. 

“O-oh, thank you, Naru… Sorry…did you just make that yourself?” she looked at the cup before her and wrapped her delicate hands around it. “I’m kind of out of it.”

“I know.”

He sighed and pulled up a chair so he could sit across from her. 

“Oh man, it’s already four… I didn’t even notice the time. I’m just trying to look over this report but I’m not getting anywhere with it.”

“It’s fine. You can look at it some other time.”

Mai tried to give him a grateful smile, but seeing him try his best to be there for her despite how obviously he felt out of his league, just made her eyes water and her lips twitch. Unable to hold it in any longer, she let the tears fall and sobbed, “T-thanks— and I’m so sorry— ”

“You don’t need to keep apologizing. You don’t have to force yourself to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

Mai nodded and covered her face. “I know.”

He looked down at his cup. He didn’t know where this was going, or what he was supposed to do, but at least it looks like he was giving her what she needed. He waited for her to compose herself.

“Shimura-san, my landlord…” Mai began, her voice breaking. “He died from a heart attack yesterday. It was very sudden… He and his wife have been very kind to me and now he’s gone.”

“... My condolences.”

Mai hiccuped. “She has a son who lives in Chiba, so I think they’re planning on having her come live with them. She’ll be okay. She’s heart broken, but at least her family will be with her, so I feel a little more at ease knowing that. I’m glad for her, but… now that means I also have no more place to stay.” 

She took a napkin and dabbed at her tears, breathing in slowly to stop herself from hyperventilating. Once she felt calm enough to continue, she pressed on, “It’s so sudden and I don’t know how I’m going to find a new place so soon that I can afford. I thought about asking Masako or Ayako if I could live with them temporarily, but Masako still lives with her family and Ayako only has a one bedroom apartment. I just don’t know what to do.”

Naru contemplated. Suddenly, Mai sobbed hysterically again.

“A-and… and S-Sato-kun! H-he—!” she fanned herself in an attempt to compose herself, “He also broke up with me yesterday. Everything’s just gone so wrong!”

He didn’t know what to say to that. Truthfully, he thought her better off for it since he never liked the guy to begin with, but that was not the thing to be saying at this moment. 

Since there was nothing he could do about that, he turned his thoughts back to her original problem. On  _ that _ end, maybe there was something he could do.

“Lin is leaving.”

Mai frowned. “What? To where?”

“He’s going back to England.”

“W-when? How long?”

“He’s leaving in two weeks and he’s most likely staying there permanently. Cambridge offered him a Professorship, which is a great opportunity for him. He wanted to announce it officially to the team next week.”

Mai’s lips trembled again and she buried her face in her hands. “N-no… That’s... Lin-san leaving… It’s a huge loss for JSPR. I’m so sorry, you must be feeling sad about it, too, and here I am off loading my troubles on you...”

Naru blinked. 

Oh no. That wasn’t what he meant.

He cleared his throat. “I didn’t say that to make you sadder. I’m saying that…” He looked down and picked at the speck of dirt in his pants. “There would be a free room in my apartment soon.”

There was silence in the room, except of course, for Mai’s occasional hiccup that she tried very hard to stifle.

“What… Are you asking me… to live with you?”

Naru shifted his jaw to the side. “I understand it may sound inappropriate, but it is simply one of your options. At least until you can find another place for yourself.”

Mai slowly nodded. “That… sounds like an idea. It sounds great, actually. But… are you sure? Won’t I get in your way?” 

Naru didn’t fail to notice that she began to blush a little redder, despite already being flushed from crying to begin with. 

Was this wise?

“It doesn’t have to be difficult, unless you decide to make it difficult.”

“W-what does that mean?”

“Nothing. That if you want to take my offer, then do so. It’s simple.”

Naru finished his hot tea and loosened the cuff on his sleeves. It was starting to get a little warm.

“Ok, you’re right. It shouldn’t be difficult. Thank you, Naru. I promise I won’t get in your way and I won’t overstay my welcome. Once I find another place, I’ll move out.”

“That’s fine.”

-0-

Naru heard the tinkling of bells preceding a voice that ventured a small, uncertain, “Hello?”

“In my office,” he answered back.

“Good afternoon, Naru,” Masako greeted as she stepped into his office. “Is Mai not in today?”

“She already went home as she had things to take care of immediately.”

“I see…” she sighed and made a motion to leave, but stopped and looked at him inquiringly. “Was there something you needed to say?” she asked.

Naru frowned. “No.”

“Oh, my apologies. It looked like you had something you wanted to say to me. If there is nothing, then I’ll take my leave for today. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Hara-san— Actually, yes. Perhaps you can sit down, if you have time.”

Masako smiled, but with a hint of confusion. “Of course. But what’s the matter?”

“I take it Mai hasn’t told you?”

She took out her cell phone and pursed her lips. “She  _ has _ been calling me, but I’ve just barely gotten off work and headed here as quickly as I can. And now I’ve just missed her. Is she okay?”

Naru nodded. “It isn’t my place to tell you her troubles, you’ll have to ask her that yourself. But I wanted to let you know that… one of the solutions we came up with was for me to offer her a place to stay.”

A couple of seconds ticked by.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Mai will be living with me.”

Masako tilted her head. “What, as in you’ll live under the same roof?”

“That was exactly what I just said.”

It was not computing, he could see that. He had a feeling this would be problematic, hence why he wanted to make sure she heard from him directly.

“Your place and Matsuzaki-san’s place were considered, but given the circumstances, we both felt those weren’t viable options.”

Masako had a strange look. 

“It’s only temporary,” he found himself explaining. This was overly complicated. Naru sighed and picked at his pants again. 

“Doesn’t Lin-san live with you?”

“He will be headed back to England. He is retiring from ghost hunting.” 

Masako looked down, processing the sudden sad news, but it seemed like a different, more troubling thought passed her head. “Then it’ll be just you and her,” she said coldly.

Naru had no response to that. He pinched the bridge of his nose, his head was starting to thump a bit. “What are you insinuating, Hara-san?”

“Nothing at all.”

He glanced at her and contemplated his position. She was refusing to look at him, positively cross and in disbelief. He was probably out of his mind, but he said it anyway. “I extend the same offer to you.”

Hara did a double take. “What?”

“Your living situation isn’t ideal either, am I correct? You can move in. With us.” He sank back into his chair and let his shoulders drop. He didn’t realize how tense he’d gotten. 

Masako considered this. Slowly, she nodded her head and mumbled, “Mai will be glad for company, I get my freedom, and… now I wouldn’t have to worry about anything.”

Naru nodded. “The only problem is that there is but one spare room, so you will have to share with Mai.”

Masako took a deep breath and met his eyes. “That’s fine. Okay, I’ll think about it.”


	5. Chapter 5

#  Chapter 5

Living with both Naru and Mai wasn't as strange as she thought it was going to be. There were a few annoyances and disagreements as the three of them tried to figure out the logistics, such as who gets to use the bathroom at what time, who's in charge of cooking (surprisingly none of them were capable cooks), who's in charge of washing dishes, and other such domestic grievances, but after a couple of weeks they finally found their rhythm.

For the most part Naru left them alone, preferring to stay in his room to read his books, but sometimes he did deign to grace them with his presence and joined in their movie nights. Lately she noticed he seemed more relaxed around the house, and occasionally she would even find a soft smile on his face.

Living with him only strengthened that attraction she felt toward him and she began to fear how hopeful she'd become. Additionally there was also Mai, who was undoubtedly also having her own feelings toward him rekindled. How could they not?

It was not a subject they broached lately.

Masako sighed and put away the last of the dishes. She cast one more glance at the clock before wiping her hands off and heading towards her room.

"Naru's still not home, huh?" Mai asked nonchalantly. She was sitting on the bed, hugging a pillow and lazily scrolling through her phone. Masako shook her head and closed the door.

The room she shared with Mai was smaller than her old room but she didn't mind it one bit. Without being under the constant watch of her parents, aunts, and grandparents, she felt much freer here, more alive.

It probably also had something to do with her constant close proximity to a certain brunette.

Masako inwardly groaned. " _ Stop thinking that again _ ," she rebuked herself. When Mai raised her head to look at her, she smiled back and shrugged. "He did say he would be late."

"You know I feel bad going home before him. Sometimes."

Masako laughed and sat down next to her on the bed.

She noted how Mai always smelled of strawberries and mango. Occasionally she'd get a whiff of the same scent while she was at work and she'd realize it was coming from herself, from being so close to Mai all the time. It was delicious and intoxicating.

"Should we sleep now, or did you want to stay up and wait for him?" Mai asked softly, noticing their proximity. There was a strange huskiness to the way she said those words, Masako noted.

Lately things between them were getting really weird, and Masako found she didn't dislike it. But the air between them sometimes felt very charged whenever they found themselves alone, like at the moment.

She didn't know what possessed her, but she sought out Mai's lips and planted on it a soft, tender kiss.

To her shock, Mai kissed her right back.

Her whole body trembled and she craved for more. She was surprised to find Mai bolder than she seemed and soon, she found herself lying down, with Mai on top of her, tongue begging to be let in. It was all going way too fast, but she was so lost in the moment she didn't care.

She closed her eyes and let herself be taken.

They shared a long bout of passionate kisses before Mai released her. "M-Masako…"

Masako opened her eyes. Breathlessly she responded, "We're a bit messed up, aren't we?" before bursting out in a fit of laughter, feeling relief and nervousness melded into one.

"We're supposed to be rivals!" Mai joined in. After a while Mai sighed in contentment, but also with a hint of sadness as she grasped Masako's hand into her own. They both noted how they were the same size: a perfect fit.

"We'll have to tell him," Mai said softly.

Naru.

Masako's heart raced. Would Naru hate her? Think she betrayed him? Find her deplorable? She never meant to fall in love with Mai. She lamented whether his heart would be broken. And what was even more confusing, is that her feelings for him were still there as well, as strong— if not stronger— than ever. Was it right to be kissing Mai when she held such strong feelings for Naru?

And what about Mai, didn't she love him, too?

How were they supposed to sort through all this mess?

They were startled when they heard the front door open and close, and the usual soft jingle of keys as Naru hung his set on the wall. Mai immediately got off of her and straightened her blouse. They looked at each other with resolution and mutually agreed, without needing words, that they were going to address this issue today. Now.

They came out of the room together. Naru turned his head at them, unaware of what was to come next.

"I see you've left me some dinner. Thank you."

"Who are you thanking?"

Naru shrugged. "Whoever made it."

Mai crossed her arms. "Masako cooked."

"Then I'm thanking Hara-san."

Masako knew Mai was just nervous and buying herself some time. Unfortunately for her, Naru realized it too and he narrowed his eyes.

"Just say it. What's going on?"

Mai bit her lip. She looked at Masako for some moral support, which she supplied with a little nod, and took a deep breath.

"Listen, I'm so sorry, Naru… Masako… I think I'm in love with Masako…"

Naru's composure never broke, or even betrayed any hint of surprise. Masako thought he must have exemplary self control.

Mai continued on. "Living with her made me realize that I really like her that way. I'm so sorry..."

Masako also felt terrible, but applauded Mai for managing to let Naru down as gently as possible. All those years Naru spent shunning her away, it was only natural she'd turn to someone else. Surely he understood where Mai was coming from?

Naru sighed. "Why are you sorry? I've known that all along."

Mai and Masako spun their heads in confusion.

"What do you mean?" Mai asked. "You're not angry? Jealous? Don't you have feelings for Masako as well?"

Now Masako tilted her head and furrowed in confusion. "No, Mai, he's always had feelings for  _ you _ . Don't you see? It was always you. And despite knowing that, I harbored these feelings for you.  _ I'm _ sorry, Naru…"

Naru pinched the bridge of his nose. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

"Mai isn't the only one…" he began, but he shook his head.

Masako felt herself tremble, feeling that the three of them were at the precipice of something big. "Mai, do you know what we talk about when you're not around? You. You're what we have in common."

"Huh? So you liked me for a while now? But wait, weren't you always telling me how much you liked Naru?"

Masako reddened. "Mai!" Now was  _ not _ the time to be confessing that!

Naru face-palmed.

Realization hit all three. Or rather, it was that they've known all along, but the three of them just always decided to dance around the issue. But now that it was all out in the open, how to proceed?

Mai bit her lip. "I've heard about this kind of thing before." She looked at Naru and studied him. "You should join us."

"...Pardon?"

"Join us," she repeated confidently. "A three-way relationship. We can make it work."


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The quoted passage is from The Song of Achilles, by Madeline Miller. It's an excellent book, you should check it out!

#  Chapter 6

Masako flipped the page on her book and reached for her cup of tea. She took a small sip and resettled herself back in position, eyes not straying away from the page. 

It was funny. She didn’t care for it at first since she found Patroclus uninteresting compared to the protagonist from the previous book she read by the same author, but things started to really pick up once Patroclus hit puberty and all his repressed emotions toward his best friend, Achilles, could no longer be contained. She particularly found the initial awkwardness and palpable sexual tension leading up to their confession very relatable. And now, with the introduction of another important character, Briseis, things were hitting too close to home. 

> “ _ Some men have wives and lovers both.” _
> 
> _ Her face looked very small, and so sad that I could not be silent. _
> 
> _ “Briseis,” I said. “If I ever wished to take a wife, it would be you.”  _

She wondered how Achilles would react to this development. Would he accept her, or feel betrayed that Patroclus developed feelings for a woman? Even in fiction, a three-way relationship was difficult and confusing.

“You don’t have to humor her by reading those kinds of books.”

Masako raised her head and smiled at Naru with a shake of her head. “So far she hasn’t been wrong in her recommendations. This one is actually very intriguing. You should give it a read.”

He smiled sardonically. 

“It’s good to expand your horizons, you know.”

“Mm,” was his noncommittal response. 

Silence descended the room once again. There was something very comfortable about the silence they shared, one that Masako treasured since it wasn’t often the two of them found themselves alone like this. With her busy schedule and his workaholic attitude, it was either always her and Mai, or him and Mai. Naru must have also thought the same, for why would he choose that fine morning to sit in the sitting room with her, when he could spend it cooped up in his room?

At least, Masako liked to believe so.

It wasn’t that it felt awkward between them. On the contrary, she felt very at ease and relaxed when she was alone with him. Mai was usually more on the spirited and energetic side and she would usually be swept up in her energy, but with Naru, they were pretty much on the same wavelength. The problem was… this meant not much development happened between the two of them. 

She cast him a glance from the corner of her eye. He seemed to be enjoying himself. But she wondered— did he act the same around Mai? How did the two of them interact when she wasn’t around? 

Suddenly she felt very self conscious. 

“Naru…”

He raised his brow to show he was listening, but he said nothing in response.

She inched a little closer to him. “I was just wondering… how do you and Mai act like when I’m gone? What sort of things do you guys do?”

At this, Naru paused in his reading and looked up. He asked bluntly, “Are you asking if Mai and I have sex when you aren’t around?”

Masako reddened.

“I— well—” Naru really had no shame sometimes. Well, since he was being so open about it, she might as well not beat around the bush. “Yes,” she finally responded. “Do you?”

“Sometimes.”

Masako stammered. She didn’t know what to do with that information. Part of her felt silly to be so shocked by such a revelation when the three of them have already slept multiple times together. She’d  _ seen  _ Naru and Mai together. But she and Naru only did stuff whenever Mai was around; never just the two of them. A big part of her was feeling jealous. 

How come they were doing it with just the two of them?

Naru must have read her train of thoughts because he closed his book and pointed out, “You and Mai have sex together without me. Often.”

Masako stammered again.

“I can hear you at night.” 

She wasn’t sure if he was annoyed, or amused when he said this. She asked carefully, “Does that bother you?”

“No.”

There was no malice, no annoyance, no joking in his tone. He just really meant it, Masako knew. Knowing this, she felt guilty and ashamed of herself. “But I am. Knowing that you and Mai do it without me. I’m such a hypocrite…”

“What exactly bothers you? The act itself, or the fact that  _ we _ don’t?”

Masako closed her book. Naru was just hitting all the nails in the head today with no mercy. She turned to him and crossed her arms, but she couldn’t meet his eyes from embarrassment. “I am upset that every time you and I are alone, all we do is sit around quietly.”

He frowned. “I thought you enjoyed that?”

“I do!” she cried, “But I would also like to… do other things. Otherwise the relationship feels very lopsided. I thought you and I were also…” she let the words hang in the air and she sighed.

Naru pondered her words for a second. “I suppose... things are difficult between us because neither of us are strong initiators.”

“That is a fair point. But that means we leave everything to Mai and that’s unfair. She might eventually think we’re incredibly boring.”

There was a hint of amusement in his voice and a small smirk forming in the corner of his lips when he replied, “I suppose we both require practice, then?”

Was Naru… trying to flirt? Masako bit her lip and wondered what her next move should be. She squared herself up and leaned closer to him, grabbing his book and setting it aside on the table. “It’s never a bad idea to want to improve ourselves, I suppose…”

Naru shifted and allowed Masako to push him down the sofa. “What shall we work on first?” he asked, snaking his arms around her back and pulling her closer to him.

Masako blanked at this and couldn’t think of the next dirty words to say. She froze and hid her face against the nook of his neck. “Ugh.”

This made Naru laugh. She wondered if Mai heard this as often as she did. It didn’t last long, but whenever he did it was always soft and strikingly boyish. She felt herself getting warm.

“We can’t be what we’re not. There’s no point forcing ourselves out of our comfort zone. The act itself is already awkward enough as is, we don’t need to add to it.”

“But you  _ can  _ talk dirty. You do it when it’s with the three of us,” she whined into his neck. 

“I do? I never realized.”

Masako lifted her head to look at him with half-lidded eyes. “Wow, you’re so natural at it you don’t even realize?”

Naru rolled his eyes. He had one arm around Masako’s slender waist to prevent her from falling off the sofa, the other hand he brought up to his head to cover his eyes. “I can’t believe I have to be the one telling you this: just relax.”

Masako put her head down on top of his chest and listened to his heartbeat. After a few minutes, she smiled. “And just let things happen naturally?”

“Mm.”

-0-

Masako was making tea when Mai finally arrived home. Instantly, the easy silence in the house was broken magically and life sprang back.

“Welcome back, Mai. Would you also like a cup?”

“Sure! Thanks, Masako!”

“How was it?”

Mai took off her jacket and went to the kitchen to help her set up the tea. “We went to six different jewelry stores trying to compare different ones and it was so tiring, but seeing him super happy is enough to wash all my tiredness away. Yasuhara-kun said he plans on proposing next week!”

Masako clapped her hands. “How exciting!”

“Well?” Mai asked, helping Masako bring the tea to the sitting room and setting a cup down in front of Naru. “And how were you guys today? Do anything fun without me?”

Naru answered, without looking up from his book, “If you are asking if we had sex while you were gone, then yes.”

Masako started choking on her tea and Mai whipped her head back and forth between them.

“Y-You did?! I can’t believe it! How’d it go?”

“We learned a few things.”

Mai raised her brow. “Oh? I’m curious to know what.”

Naru shrugged. “Maybe you’ll find out later.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I finally finished! It's been fun exploring this OT3! I hope you guys enjoyed exploring this idea with me. Happy reading :)

Masako closed her eyes and sighed softly, feeling deliciously content as Mai’s fingers absentmindedly traced little circles on her bare back. 

She murmured, “Tomorrow is going to be a very busy day. We should get some rest.”

“Aww, but it’s too early,” Mai whined, and Masako could practically feel her pouting. “Besides, I’m too excited to sleep. After five years of planning, Yasuhara-san and Chika-chan are finally getting married. I never knew weddings involved that much planning.”

“Yasuhara-san has always been meticulous… But they must both be feeling very nervous right now, being so close to its culmination. I hope they are resting well.”

“He has nerves of steel, or at least, pretends to have one. I kind of want to see how he looks right now. Maybe he’s a mess, huh? We should video call him.”

Masako giggled and readjusted herself as Mai spooned her from the back. Feeling Mai’s warm skin reminded her that she was getting a little chilly so she tugged on the blanket and covered themselves up. Once she settled in, thoughts swirled around in her head.

Wedding. Marriage. 

What would it mean for them? 

Their relationship was undeniably complicated and highly unusual, but it surprisingly worked very well. Sometimes she even forgets it’s been a little over five years since the day their threesome was established; it was all just so natural, so second nature, yet no one else but them knew of it. Or maybe even _could_ know of it. Marriage is the formal recognition of two people’s love for one another, but who would be willing to recognize and accept a relationship so unusual and forbidden? 

She shuddered to think what Naru’s parents would say. She shuddered to think what her own family would say. Come to think of it, she wondered if maybe the other SPR members suspected something strange was going on…. What would they think of them if they found out?

After a few minutes of silence, she asked, “Mai… What do you think about weddings?”

“Hmm… Well, as a young girl I wanted to wear a fancy Western-style wedding dress. It just seemed so romantic with the veil and flower and the strange ceremony. But now I’m not so sure. I think I’d still like to do a ceremony, but I’m also totally fine not having one. I guess it would all depend. What do _you_ think of it, Masako?”

Masako closed her eyes and recalled her younger days. “I used to think it was something you had to do because everyone is supposed to get married at some point.”

Mai laughed. “People don't _need_ marriage, Masako.”

“I know,” Masako retorted with a roll of her eyes. “That’s what I _used_ to think as a young girl. I’ve heard that nowadays people can just be boyfriends and girlfriends forever.”

“Still, it’d be nice to get married. You know people now more and more people choose to get married without having an actual wedding since it’s so expensive. I think that’s smart. In a way, it’s really just an elaborate party.”

Masako shrugged. “I think I would still like to have one. I’ve always imagined myself having a traditional Japanese ceremony...”

“Ahh, you would look so beautiful, Masako! I can picture it!”

Masako turned around to face her and smiled. “That would be an interesting ceremony, wouldn’t it? You with your white dress, and me with _shiromuku_.”

“What would Naru wear?”

“A _hakama_ , of course.”

“What, no way. He’d look better in a tuxedo.”

“Assuming he’d even want to do a ceremony…”

“... Why do you both talk as if I’m not here?”

Masako and Mai turned around in surprise.

“Oh, sorry…. we thought you were asleep! We didn’t wake you up, did we?”

Naru shifted and turned himself so that he was lying down on his stomach with his head resting on his folded arms. “I woke up several minutes ago,” he answered with his eyes closed. 

Masako traced his outline from the top of his head, to his bare shoulders, to the gentle cup of his lower spine, to the curve of his buttocks barely covered by the thin blanket from the waist down. It was difficult to not feel something stir within herself even though it had just been a few hours since they’ve all fooled around. 

“I don’t particularly care one way or another about a ceremony,” he continued, “but it would be easier to not have to explain our situation. Besides, wouldn’t this be normally considered taboo?”

“Ha ha ha! It’s kind of exciting when you call it that way…”

Naru sighed. “Mai…”

“But where would this go?” Masako asked. “Eventually the others would wonder. And… what would we do when it comes to starting a family?” 

There was a heavy silence in the room. Masako’s heart sank. She realized that these were probably questions that shouldn’t be asked at that moment in time. But to her surprise, Mai squeezed her hand tight and looked at her with a loving smile.

“Honestly I’ve thought about it a lot, too. Personally, I don’t want to bear a child; I’m too accident prone anyway. But I’m not against having children, so if you and Naru want us to have kids, I will do my best to help you both raise them. As to what others would think--well they can just keep wondering.”

“It would be much simpler without children and I see no advantage to having any, though I am not entirely opposed to having them if that’s something we all decide on,” Naru answered. “Just keep in mind that our families would most likely ask us to visit often to see their grandchildren and that would open us up to questions.”

“Well you could just tell them it’s you and Masako.”

Naru raised his brow. “And you would be fine being left out? Visiting my parents back in England would mean we may be gone on holiday for days.”

“Well… I could still tag along…?”

Naru looked at her wryly. “What, we’d pose you as the nanny?”

“N-no… maybe as the auntie…”

Masako shook her head. “The child would also look too much like me and Naru…”

“I don’t care that our kid would look like you two. They’d be so beautiful with both your genes. But…” Mai sat up, letting the blanket fall as she rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly, “I can’t say that I wouldn’t feel left out.”

This time, Masako squeezed her hand. “I know. I understand. I’d feel the same way.”

“But I don’t want you to feel like you can’t have a normal family, Masako. It’s not fair.”

Smiling, Masako shrugged. “This is very complicated so I don’t know what the answer is, but it’s too early for us to decide anyway. Let’s think about it some more, okay?”

“Okay,” Mai replied, “we’ll revisit this topic. Naru,” she suddenly asked with a frown, “where are you going?”

Naru had gotten off the bed and had just finished putting on his pants and was currently working on righting his shirt. “I’m hungry. I’m going to prepare something for dinner. Is there something either of you would like in particular?”

“We have fish. Let’s grill it and I’ll help you make the side dishes,” Masako offered, climbing over Mai and grabbing her clothes off the floor. “Mai, get started on the rice?”

Mai smiled. “Yeah, I can do that.”

  
_Fin_   
  
  
  



End file.
